What Would Daniel Couchman Do in a General Election?
written on Monday, December 30, 2008 by Huy Dang
On Tuesday, October 14, 2008, Canadians went out and voted. While there was a record low number of voters that came out to vote, Canadians still elected the Conservative Party of Canada to continue leading our beautiful and prosperous country. And we can't forget this... Stephen Harper came out of the election with a stronger minority, when I was hoping for a strong majority.
Well, prior to to the 40th general election, Daniel Couchman (David Couchman's younger brother) already had his plans set out... he would vote for each party based on how the leaders of those parties looked!
Now, even though we don't know what party Mr. Couchman voted for on that day, we thought we should share with you how he decided which party deserved his vote.
For Mr. Couchman, it was based on pity, and how funny people looked. But now, we'll tell you what he thought of each party.
The following were the leaders of each party at the time of the election campaigns. Since then, things have changed, with Stephane Dion being replaced by Michael Ignatieff.
Stephen Harper (Conservative Party of Canada) During election time, Mr. Harper decided to call for an election because he believed that Parliament was dysfunctional.
Mr. Couchman decided not to vote for Mr. Harper because he thought Stephen Harper looked like someone who would "molest children."
With this strange assumption, Couchman decided that it would be wise not to vote for Mr. Harper.
Of course, with this assumption, we know for sure that Mr. Couchman did not vote for Mr. Harper.
Now, moving on...
Stephane Dion (Liberal Party of Canada) Daniel Couchman decided that the Liberals would be the party to vote for. Why? Well, there were several factors that influence Mr. Couchman's decision:
We knew Mr. Dion would not win, at all.
Mr. Dion looked like a sore loser.
Mr. Dion looked like a kid who wanted to become class president but could not because he did not have the popularity.
Essentially, Mr. Couchman decided to vote for Mr. Dion and his crappy Liberal Party of Canada because it was based on pity.
Did you really think the Liberals had a chance of winning during the election? If you did, you were a crazy bastard.
So I guess we know who Daniel Couchman voted for. Now, why didn't he vote for the NDP or the hippie Green Party? Why don't you read below? Look at the table below, and you can read the reasons as to why these other leaders did not make the cut:
Jack Layton (NDP)
The reasoning behind Mr. Couchman's decision not to vote for the NDP was because of Jack Layton's creepy moustache.
Elizabeth May (Green Party)
Based on political views, the Green Party doesn't really have anything to offer. And according to Couchman, the Green Party was a wasted vote because the leader... doesn't look flaterring.
Gilles Duceppe (Bloc Quebecois)
Even though the Bloc Quebecois had no presence in Mr. Couchman's federal riding (Calgary Southwest), we thought we should mention him anyway. Why? Well, the Bloc just sucks, and we already know why. Plus, Gilles Duceppe looks like a douche.
As for the other parties: they suck. This page does not represent the opinions of Huy's HomeTurf!!!@Home. We just thought this would be interesting. We will remove this page from our website should any comments be sent to us.
On Tuesday, October 14, 2008, Canadians went out and voted. While there was a record low number of voters that came out to vote, Canadians still elected the Conservative Party of Canada to continue leading our beautiful and prosperous country. And we can't forget this... Stephen Harper came out of the election with a stronger minority, when I was hoping for a strong majority.
During election time, Mr. Harper decided to call for an election because he believed that Parliament was dysfunctional.
Daniel Couchman decided that the Liberals would be the party to vote for. Why? Well, there were several factors that influence Mr. Couchman's decision:
